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Saturday, September 13, 2008

A modest proposal for the disposal of certain medical wastes

So, I've been involved in quite the lengthy philosophical discussion with the wife tonight about the state of the world. One of the threads we keep returning to is the state of the global environment, and the effects of humanity on it.

Anywho, so during this conversation, I mentioned that scientists measuring the quality of tap water have found caffeine, birth control, nicotine and prescription drugs in tap water. I turns out that a lot of drugs are over prescribed and end up getting flushed down the drain, and cannot be filtered out of water by existing systems. So, the wife was pretty worried by this, but luckily I came upon and inspired solution to deal with these, errrrr...., solutions:

COURTNEY LOVE. All of these drugs are intended to be used within the human body, and, well Courney Love is intended for the consumption of all of the above substances. By my un-scientific reconing, Courtney Love's body alone could be used to cleanse enough water for the Cleveland municipal water works. After the success of the Courney Love Municipal Water Filtration Plant is proven, it's a simple process of serving other cities. The Rolling Stones alone could serve most of the American Northeast. So, as a matter of patriotism, I implore Britney Spears to please get back on the wagon.... or off the wagon-- I can never keep those straight, but you get the idea

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